I’ll lead with this simple example of what I’m talking about. When I first started practicing I struggled quite a bit with the standing/balancing postures. I am still working on these postures, and I anticipate the same will remain true for my entire life. At least I hope so. Yoga helped me realize very quickly, like in the first week, how poor my balance really was. I loved the challenge of doing Eagle Pose (Garudasana), but couldn’t always hook my leg around my calf. Well, that and squaring my shoulders and hips, aligning my spine straight up and down, lowering my torso, and pulling everything in together in order to work virtually every main joint in the body. I figured I wasn’t successful in the pose unless I could do ALL of that. One of the hardest things for a perfectionist to do is to be content with “what is” instead of beating oneself up about “how it’s supposed to be.” In the physical practice of yoga, or asana, there is no “should”, there only “is.” I've been working hard on inversion postures for over a month now and cannot nail a handstand without a wall nearby, but that's quite okay. One day I will be able to accomplish this feat, but I must say I think getting there is truly most of the point to begin with. Be content with your is.
Locked away in each of us are the secrets of the universe. Each one of us holds an amazing capacity for more than we could have ever imagined. By letting go of expectations and refraining from ridiculing and humiliating ourselves we nurture room for growth. The growth that happens will spread into all areas of our lives. Our relationships with friends, loved ones, co-workers, and even perfect strangers will all change. We will become more attentive, receptive, compassionate, and truthful. Other people will start to reflect what we pour out. If we are in constant turmoil with what is going on inside ourselves we will never be what we can be with all that is not inside ourselves. Don’t let your circumstances pull you down. A quote from a movie I saw recently comes to mind. “It will all be alright in the end, and if it’s not alright, it’s not the end.”
Putting our attention on the “how” helps eliminate a lot of the fluff that tends to reside within our thoughts. During yoga we strive to focus fully on feeling in the now, versus thinking in the past or future. The rude person in line at the store from earlier in the day has no bearing on what is happening right there and now on your mat. Likewise, nor do thoughts about what the rest of our day or evening will entail. Shutting down the thoughts that may come from outta nowhere is not what we ought strive towards. A more effective means is to focus our being on just being. Replacing our thoughts of things that don’t matter at that moment (pretty much everything outside of your mat) with thoughts of what we’re feeling at that moment. Above all, be grateful always
Life is not a competition. There seems to be a prevalence in the importance of maintaining a certain lifestyle or standard of living among our society. Bottom-line ~ some people have more than we do, and so very many have much less than we do. Remember, it’s not what, but how. It’s not what we have, or don’t have, it’s how we are with what we do have that is important. It’s not about having the biggest house, the best clothes, the fattest bank account, or any of that stuff. Quite frankly, I value my body and health far more than all of those combined. Most of all these days I’m feeling very grateful ~ grateful for all that I have been through in life to bring me to right here and now. I don’t have all of the answers to life’s questions, but I do have a very important answer to help in virtually every aspect of our lives. How is more important than what.
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